1115.org

Alberto “Buttercheeks” Gonzales has had a sudden lapse of memory failure. That is to say, he now recalls things again. He was clearly better off, I think, being unable to recall anything and everything of any significance. Because what he remembers now does not uniquely comport with what actually happened. Or what he himself said or wrote before.

On repudiating the Geneva conventions, here’s how Alberto remembers it would like us to remember it.

TL: And what about the “quaint notion” reference that you made about the Geneva Conventions.

Gonzales: Oh, that’s an easy one. The “quaint” reference was in a confidential memo to the president, and what I said was, “Mr. President, I think it is fair to ask whether certain provisions of the Geneva Conventions — such as a requirement that you provide athletic uniforms, commissary privileges, scientific instruments, a monthly allowance — those are all required by the Geneva Conventions to prisoners of war.” And when I said it was “quaint,” what I was saying is I believe it’s fair to ask whether or not those provisions — when you’re dealing with terrorists who do not follow the laws of war and who kill innocents indiscriminately — aren’t those provisions quaint and outdated? I didn’t mean to say that the provisions of the Geneva Conventions requiring basic humane treatment were outdated. No, I didn’t say that. What I said was certain provisions like those I just described were quaint and outdated and should be revisited. Let me make one final point, and that is I strongly support the primary objective of the Geneva Conventions, which is to ensure the humane treatment of people captured on the battlefield or civilians captured in times of war. Those are very, very important protections, and I certainly support them — as does President Bush, and he was clearly on record in that respect.

Still the same old Buttercheeks. Indulging in bald-faced lies that are effortlessly proved to be bald-faced lies. Did his Mama really teach him nothing better?

Here’s the actual content (pdf) of the “quaint notion” memo Buttercheeks wrote to President Bush in 2002:

The nature of the new war places a high premium on other factors, such as the ability to quickly obtain information from captured terrorists and their sponsors in order to avoid further atrocities against American civilians, and the need to try terrorists for war crimes such as wantonly killing civilians. In my judgment, this new paradigm renders obsolete Geneva’s strict limitations on questioning of enemy prisoners and renders quaint some of its provisions requiring that captured enemy be afforded such things as commissary privileges, scrip (i.e., advances of monthly pay), athletic uniforms, and scientific instruments.

Even John Yoo wouldn’t be able to argue that the only part of the Geneva Conventions that Buttercheeks dismissed were the ones relating to innocuous things like “athletic uniforms, commissary privileges, scientific instruments, a monthly allowance”.

And here’s the really funny part: Buttercheeks really seems to have some memory issues. He had memory problems even back in 2002, well before he showed up on Capital Hill to repeatedly break his own previous world records for being unable to recall things under questioning.

The Geneva Conventions do not exactly require that prisoners of war must be provided “athletic uniforms” or “scientific instruments.”

Many of the provisions Gonzales labels as “quaint” simply do not exist. For example, nothing in the Geneva Convention relative to the Treatment of Prisoners of War requires a detaining power to provide detainees with “athletic uniforms” or “scientific instruments.” The only (provision) which even vaguely resemble such a requirement (is) … Article 72, which provides that detention guards cannot seize mail sent to detainees which contains harmless items such as “scientific instruments” and “sports outfits.”

No halfway competent attorney could confuse “thou shalt not confiscate, if received by mail” with “thou shalt provide”. In Buttercheeks’ defense, though, Article 27 mandates that detainees must be given appropriate “[c]lothing, underwear and footwear”. Perhaps Buttercheeks considers underwear to be an athletic uniform (little is known at the present time about Buttercheeks’ althetic or exercise habits), and footwear to be a scientific instrument? (Why should he be dazed and confused only about legal matters?)