1115.org

How’s this for the-most-inspired-interpretation-seen-in-a-long-time of classified information, and the proper etiquette for disclosing it to the press and the public:

A large U.S. spy satellite has lost power and could hit the Earth in late February or early March, government officials said Saturday.

The satellite, which no longer can be controlled, could contain hazardous materials, and it is unknown where on the planet it might come down, they said. The officials spoke on condition of anonymity because the information is classified as secret.

Ah, so that’s what it means for information to be classified as secret? That you can only disclose it anonymously? (I must confess I had it totally wrong. Silly me!)

And, of course, once someone has disclosed classified information to the press, it becomes perfectly kosher for official spokesmen to confirm the information on the record, and comment on it, and so forth. The floodgates just open.

“Appropriate government agencies are monitoring the situation,” said Gordon Johndroe, a spokesman for the National Security Council, when asked about the situation after it was disclosed by other officials.

Still Mr. Johndroe:

He would not comment on whether it is possible for the satellite to be perhaps shot down by a missile. He said it would be inappropriate to discuss any specifics at this time.

So, presumably, that will be the next thing we’ll be reading about — just as soon as an anonymous source spills the beans — and then hearing from Mr. Johndroe’s mouth? Or maybe all that is required is the passage of a decent interval of time. He did, after all, say “at this time”.

And they don’t come out and say so, not in so many words, but it’s safe to assume that this used to be classified too (and is now declassified-by-dissemination):

The spacecraft contains hydrazine, rocket fuel, according to a government official who spoke on condition of anonymity. Hydrazine, a colorless liquid with an ammonia-like odor, is a toxic chemical and can cause harm to anyone who contacts it.