This report has to be filed under “You’re effing kidding me!”

The United States President, who arrived in Sydney last night, brought not one Jumbo jet, but three, as well as another two aircraft that carry aircraft. The President’s Jumbo has a back-up, and the back-up has a back-up.
[...]
The Jumbos are carrying 700 of the President’s closest friends, including a doctor, nurse, personal chef and four cooks.

They are also carrying advisers, and it is clear the President will not be short of advice.

His entourage includes 50 White House political aides, 150 national security advisers and 200 specialists from other government departments.

Five aircraft? And the two “aircraft carriers” carried another two. And were all the extra planes laid on just for the Australia trip, or is this is the way Georgie travels everywhere? (Rumor is that Georgie is concerned about his legacy. After the Iraq war millstone around his neck, the next entry on the list of charges that will constitute his legacy document can be his environmental douchebaggery and his carbon footprint.)

What I would dearly love to know is: by what algorithm did they determine they needed a backup for the backup, but not a back-up for the back-up’s back-up?

An entourage of 700? Holy oxcrap. That exceeds the most decadently excessive norms of excess.

150 national security advisers? He has 150 national security advisers, to begin with? (Where has he been hiding them all this time?) And why on earth does he need to take all 150 with him to Australia?

And the 50 White House political aides? What role could they possibly be expected to play on the trip?

What the eff is this? The annual staff picnic? How much did taxpayers get stiffed for this mega-junket?

Last question: what is Georgie overcompensating for on such a massive scale? This goes way beyond having a small penis:

Methinks George may have no penis at all.
And maybe just one shriveled-up ball.

That thing he’s been doing to the country for the last six and a half years? That has to involve artificial devices, of the strap-on variety.