1115.org

How long will it be before other homeless bums will be stopping this guy in late night alleys to ask him: “Hey buddy, didn’t you used to be the leader of the free world?”

And despite all the terrible news, which I don’t pay attention to, I’m optimistic about our prospects in Iraq, and I have a rug that reminds me I’m optimistic

Those, unfortunately, are not quite the actual words of one George W. Bush.

They’re only a free verse translation of what he was saying yesterday in Tipp City, Ohio, about TWAT.

*** Update, 8:15 am ***

Maybe I was too hasty in the post. Maybe I should also have included some of the priceless actual words. Herewith rectifying my error (nothing to do with the translation above, just a priceless bit of Bush’s best from the transcript):

Q Mr. President, how would you respond to the rather mistaken idea that the war in Iraq is becoming a war in Vietnam?

THE PRESIDENT: Yes, thank you. There’s a lot of differences. First, the Iraqi people voted for a modern constitution, and then set up a government under that constitution. Secondly, the — that’s as opposed to two divided countries: north and south. In my judgment, the vast majority of people want to live underneath that constitution they passed. They want to live in peace. And what you’re seeing is radical on the fringe creating chaos in order to either get the people to lose confidence in their government, or for us to leave.

A major difference as far as here at home is concerned is that our military is an all-volunteer army, and we need to keep it that way. By the way, the way you keep it that way is to make sure our troops have all they need to do their job, and to make sure their families are happy. (Applause.)

There are some similarities, of course — death is terrible. Another similarity, of course, is that Vietnam was the first time a war was brought to our TV screens here in America on a regular basis. I’m looking around looking for baby boomers; I see a few of us here. It’s a different — it was the first time that the violence and horror of war was brought home. That’s the way it is today.

Americans, rightly so, are concerned about whether or not we can succeed in Iraq. Nobody wants to be there if we can’t succeed, especially me. And these — violence on our TV screens affects our frame of mind, probably more so today than what took place in Vietnam. I want to remind you that after Vietnam, after we left, the — millions of people lost their life. The Khmer Rouge, for example, in Cambodia. And my concern is there would be a parallel there; that if we didn’t help this government get going, stay on its feet, be able to defend itself, the same thing would happen. There would be the slaughter of a lot of innocent life. The difference, of course, is that this time around the enemy wouldn’t just be content to stay in the Middle East, they’d follow us here.

It’s interesting, I met with some congressman today, and one person challenged that. He said, I don’t necessarily agree with that. In other words, I have told people that this is a unique war where an enemy will follow us home, because I believe that. But if you give al Qaeda a safe haven and enough time to plan and plot, I believe the risk is they will come and get us. And I freely admit that much of my thinking was affected on September the 11th, 2001, and the aftermath of September the 11th, 2001. I wanted to share that with you and the American people so that they understand that when I make decisions, why I’m making decisions. I can assure you I’m not going to make any decisions in regard to anybody’s life based upon a poll or a focus group. (Applause.)

What kind of people would be able to look into their soul at the end of that and find…applause?

But let my snarkiness not distract you from the fact that President Bush was brave enough to admit in public that he hasn’t been able to think straight since september 11, 2001. That’s always the first step. Now we have to get him some help.