What’s with Cyrille Y. Morotte, the 36 year old Frenchman who tossed a bundle of papers over the White House fence on March 22? This is the second time he’s tossed something over the White House fence. The last time was in June 2004, after which he was deported. With dogged persistence he managed to get back into the country. How he achieved that is currently being investigated. Apparently he was on a may-not-enter list. So much for Homeland Security!

But back to Cyrille. He’s obviously trying to make some kind of political statement. Whatever he’s trying to say, he believes in it strongly enough to sneak back into the US just to fling those papers over the fence. But it’s not working, because his message is not getting out. The public has no idea what those papers said. The public has no idea what Cyrille is trying to say.

What he needs to do next time, I think, is go with a symbolic act. Instead of papers he should toss something that will be reported worldwide, and that will forcefully express whatever opinion he’s trying to express. Assuming that flinging stuff over the fence is not his way of expressing admiration for Bush, what I suggest for next time is suitably packaged processed dog food. Processed, that is, by a dog. A nice big package, all the better to get everyone’s attention. And no harm done if it is helpfully labeled “Dog Poop” in big, bold letters. That way, when CNN covers the incident live for a couple of hours, they will be able to zoom in nicely and keep telling the world over and over again that what he flung was dung.

With any luck, Cyrille may even be able to inspire a rash of copycat crimes. I can think of a lot of people who might find the idea of flinging dog poop over the White House fence appealing. Especially since they don’t even seem to arrest you for the first offence (Cyrille wasn’t). They do deport you, though, so if you’re a foreigner (or an illegal immigrant), adopt a free-trade philosophy and outsource the job to an out-of-work American. Enterprising out-of-work Americans will, no doubt, be found loitering in the vicinity of the White House, carrying large, well-labeled packages, and discreetly advertising them from time to time.