1115.org

Bart: Milhouse, what happened?! You were supposed to be watching the factory!
Milhouse: I was watchin’. First it started to fall over, then it fell over.

When the wheels come off, they come off. In what appears to be a bit of preemptive fingerpainting, the President (he’s still President, right?) held a Campaign 2004-style town hall on Thursday with U.S. servicemen in Iraq. The nature of the video conference struck some reporters as “wooden” enough to warrant questioning as to whether the whole thing was as staged as a performance of A Chorus Line (no homo.)

Since the general order covering civilians working at the Pentagon boils down to “lie first and deflect questions later,” initial media reports were colored by the comments of Pentagon official, Allison Barber:

Ms. Barber insisted later the questions were not rehearsed. The military had been told ahead of time only about topics the president might want to talk about, not specific questions. “We just knew broad themes,” she said.

Unfortunately for Barber, she was caught on video showing her (metaphorical) ass:

So here’s what you to be prepared for, Captain Kennedy, is that the president is going to ask some questions. He may ask all six of them, he may ask three of them. He might have such a great time talking to you, he might come up with some new questions. So what we want to be prepared for is to not stutter. So if there’s a question that the president comes up with that we haven’t drilled through today, then I’m expecting the microphone to go right back to you, Captain Kennedy, and you to handle [it].

Not a great start to the day’s PR message, but the things headed south at Scott McClellan’s press gaggle and press briefing:

[AM Gaggle]

Q: How were they selected, and are their comments to the president pre-screened, any questions or anything…

MR. McCLELLAN: No.

Q: Not at all?

MR. McCLELLAN: This is a back-and-forth.

[PM Briefing]

Q Scott, why did the administration feel it was necessary to coach the soldiers that the President talked to this morning in Iraq?

MR. McCLELLAN: I’m sorry, I don’t know what you’re suggesting.
[…]
Q But we asked you specifically this morning if there would be any screening of questions or if they were being told in any way what they should say or do, and you indicated no.

MR. McCLELLAN: I don’t think that’s what the question was earlier today. I think the question earlier today was asking if they could ask whatever they want, and I said, of course…

Obviously the term “liar” isn’t quite big enough for Barber or McClellan, both of whom draw six-figure salaries to lie and mislead. It’s only even worth mentioning this time because the military was asked by agents of their commander-in-chief to participate in a worthless PR stunt when their time could have been much better spent on patrol, training, or even sleeping. But McClellan went way past ordinary lying later in his briefing, treading on ground covered only by Ari Fleischer’s “they’re reminders to all Americans that they need to watch what they say, watch what they do” statement.

Helen Thomas: What does the President mean by “total victory” — that we will never leave Iraq until we have “total victory”? What does that mean?

MR. McCLELLAN: Free and democratic Iraq in the heart of the Middle East, because a free and democratic Iraq in the heart of the Middle East will be a major blow to the ambitions –

Thomas: If they ask us to leave, then we’ll leave?

MR. McCLELLAN: I’m trying to respond. A free and democratic Iraq in the heart of the broader Middle East will be a major blow to the ambitions of al Qaeda and their terrorist associates. They want to establish or impose their rule over the broader Middle East — we saw that in the Zawahiri letter that was released earlier this week by the intelligence community.

Thomas: They also know we invaded Iraq.

MR. McCLELLAN: Well, Helen, the President recognizes that we are engaged in a global war on terrorism. And when you’re engaged in a war, it’s not always pleasant, and it’s certainly a last resort. But when you engage in a war, you take the fight to the enemy, you go on the offense. And that’s exactly what we are doing. We are fighting them there so that we don’t have to fight them here. September 11th taught us –

Thomas: It has nothing to do with — Iraq had nothing to do with 9/11.

MR. McCLELLAN: Well, you have a very different view of the war on terrorism, and I’m sure you’re opposed to the broader war on terrorism. The President recognizes this requires a comprehensive strategy, and that this is a broad war, that it is not a law enforcement matter.

Setting aside McClellan’s continued conflation of 9/11 and Iraq, his blatant smear of Thomas is simply unacceptable. McClellan stands at a podium in front of the White House seal, and speaks for the President. His job isn’t to cast aspersions on the beliefs of White House reporters or any other Americans, it is to inform them. It’s coincidental that just last week I mentioned a panel discussion I attended where Helen Thomas herself spoke of the atmosphere surrounding reporters and the fear of being labeled “un-American” or “unpatriotic.”

This administration is falling over right before our eyes. Their policies are a detriment to 99% of Americans, but it’s their utter contempt for the truth and cynical effort to hide their actions that did them in. All that’s left is the fall and how much of the country they will drag down with them in a desperate but futile attempt to save themselves. It’s gonna be fun to watch the President turn to his advisors and say “You were supposed to be watching my Presidency.”