Obvs ‘04: A Different Kind of Campaign

by matt

Having extended interview requests to the three major candidates, we were shocked when we finally received an affirmative response. Interestingly enough, that response wasn’t from one of the campaigns that we contacted. Nevertheless, we are proud (not to mention horrified) to bring you the men who put the “horse” in “darkhorse” in their […]

Yeah, He Was a Terrorist…But he SO Kicked Ass in LOTR

by Jason

Hamas founder Sheikh Ahmed Yassin (assasinated Monday in an Israeli helicopter attack) vs. Sarumon The White (defeated by a grove of animatronic trees in Lord Of The Rings:The Two Towers)
(EDIT: Astounding coincidence alert! I swear on the life of my G4 that I didn’t see Low Culture before posting this. D’oh!)

Not Surprising, but Still Nauseating

by matt

Jesus Christ.
From The New Republic:

CHENEY’S CHENEY: A lot of attention has been focused on Richard Clarke’s story about Bush pulling him aside on the day after 9/11 and hectoring him about tying the attacks to Iraq. But an even more frightening anecdote from Clarke’s book is being overlooked. On 9/11 itself, as Bush scrambled about […]

Irony in the Ironing

by Jason

Last July, the Bush Administration signed the Burmese Freedom and Democracy Act, a move that banned Burmese products because of that country’s awful human rights record. According to the U.S. Treasury Department, violators of the import ban are subject to fines or jail time.
Of course, that hasn’t stopped some nefarious retailers from selling Burmese […]

I Don’t Enjoy Being Misquoted

by matt

What I really said was: “6 Million Ways to Die, 10 9 8 7 6 5 4
3 2 Murder 1 lyric at your door, Tical bring it to that ass-raw”
Method Man: So necessary.

It’s a Growth Industry

by matt

After seeing this sign around the corner from my office, I realized that maybe there is an upside to the massively irresponsible environmental policies of the Bush Administration: Private sector job growth through pollution and destruction. I hereby retract 2.7% of the criticism I have leveled at the President.

The Scott McLellan Five

by Jason

5. Attempting to placate a disgruntled press corps, Scott McLellan launches into his ace Nixon impersonation.
4. When bored, try killing time by projecting a bunny rabbit on the White House seal.
3. “So this hippie walks into a bar…”
2. Casting call for the next Verizon commercial.
1. “This finger-quote thing seems to work a lot […]

It’s That Time Again

by matt

Honey Time.
It is your duty as a faithful 1115.org reader to go buy Honey on DVD. Granted, it’s not the best movie ever, but Jessica Alba is hotttt. And buying a copy of the DVD is the best way to ensure that she has the opportunity to display her talents in […]

Must See Avoid TV

by matt

“Good morning, what can I tell you?”
As many of you know, I’m originally from Pittsburgh, Pa. Iron City, Steel City, City of Champions, even…god forbid, Knowledge City. While Pittsburgh has been the butt of almost as many jokes as Cleveland, I remain a proud Pittsburgher, and very little could ever change that.
Dennis Miller […]

Richard Clarke on 60 Minutes

by matt

I’m just getting up to speed on Richard Clarke, so I’ll comment on him and his book Against All Enemies after I actually read it. I will say that his claims that the administration wanted to invade Iraq even before Afghanistan match exactly with what Bob Woodward reported in his book Bush at War. […]